Season 1

• s1e1 - oh look a dichotomy!…and a stupid fucking emo boy…and a wannabe terminator.  Totally not Arnold.
• s1e2 - haha emo boy somehow gets up with cheerleader lizard girl.  David Icke would be so revolted.
• s1e3 - nothing happens.  hintings of a plot connection to x-files. [ed note - that they didn’t fucking USE!]
• s1e4 - why am I still watching?  Oh yah, terminator bro - gonna put money down that you knocked that chick up.
• s1e5 - ooh, a “soldier” joins. OMG Krycek is that emo fuck’s father?!?!?!?!?
• s1e6 - nothing happened.
• s1e7 - nothing happened.
• s1e8 - nothing happened.
• s1e9 - nothing happened.
• s1e10 - nothing happened.
• s1e11 - nothing happened.
• s1e12 - nothing happened.
• s1e13 - Anna rags all over the sky.

Season 2

• s2e1 - nothing happened.
• s2e2 - nothing happened.  Old woman in the basement/caves of an alien ship (where did said basement/caves come from wtf?)
• s2e3 - nothing happened.
• s2e4 - nothing happened.
• s2e5 - nothing happened.
• s2e6 - WHY THE FUCK WOULD YOU KILL OFF KRYCEK?!!?!?!?  EVERYONE KNOWS YOU ONLY DO THAT IN YOUR LAST SEASON YOU TWITS!!!!  Wow he was the only one I was watching, even…That felt like when X-files killed the Lone Gunmen.
• s2e7 - nothing happened.
• s2e8 - nothing happened.
• s2e9 - nothing happened.
• s2e10 - EVERYTHING HAPPENED!  W….T….F?!?!?!?!?  That asshat emo kid (whose mother should have shot) finally died, everyone’s found out, covers are blown all around.  Somehow the chick that managed to keep herself alive in a basement for who knows how fucking long was killed, somehow the “best tracker Anna had” was killed by his own daughter.”  Humanity’s stoned to hell on Anna’s bliss, and oh look - humanity’s back to being rebellious from a basement a mile underground that somehow isn’t affected by a telepathic wave.

Holy fuck this show needs to get shitcanned so hard it’s made an example of.